that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Randomize
