I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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