You're completely useless in the revolution.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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