I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
