You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
