I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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