She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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