Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
