Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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