Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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