I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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