I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
