So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
