ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
