But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Randomize
