Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
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