just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
