Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
