what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
