oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
