coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
