I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize