He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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