im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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