They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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