Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
