I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
