Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
