Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
organizing the empties. That sober.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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