A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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