we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
