Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
