ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
