Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Randomize
