Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
