one word: firstdatebathroomanal
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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