Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
