is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Acid is not a monday night drug
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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