Just fell off a train. Bad.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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