the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
