I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
