didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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