Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Fuck appropriateness.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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