I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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