Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
