Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize