It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
lol hangovers are for mortals.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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