I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
