But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
