with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
