Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
